The Soul Bond Meme

[disassembling]

"I can't live without you...literally."

Wake up. Do what you have to. Work. School. Save the world. Avenge your father's death. Go back to sleep. Average day, for human, demon, sailor scout, angel, slayer, what have you. Though there's some part of you that wonders, in the back of your mind, if this is the day you'll meet your bond.

Because your world is just like ours - or how yours was, in another universe - but with one addition: the soul bond. The soul bond is a concept as old as time itself. People don't question the process, it just is. Some say that it comes from the beginning of time, where each soul was created in a pair, and throughout the lifetimes those souls are reborn into, they search for each other. This is the soul bond. Even if that's mostly faded into myth, it's generally excepted that there is only only one person for anyone. So, soulmates.

Not exactly. Soul bonds are more. They are about the joining of bodies: sexually and psychically. The bond isn't necessarily about love, though the close connection facilitates that emotion growing, and some fondness does appear in almost every case. It's bigger than love, bigger than hate, bigger than anything else; it's finding yourself in someone else, and your never wanting to lose that. Needless to say, the soul bond is the cornerstone of life and society. Marriage is reserved for the bonded, and you're expected to be searching for that other half. There's a good biological reason for that, too, as the unbonded cannot reproduce and those who have not found their bond are doomed to die extremely early in comparison to their peers and in a most painful, withering fashion. Who would want that?

In this world, sex is had with those who are not the other half of your bond, even if society considers that frivolous. For the truth is, sex with any other will never be as good as sex with your other half. When you make love to someone who isn't yours, you'll know it. It's a disappointment.

When you so much as see your bond for the first time, or at least for the first time after you've reached sexual maturity, you'll know, even if you're already "with" someone else. The signs are inescapable. You'll know it's them. You'll become hyper-focused on them, your heart will race, your muscles tighten, your brain shoot off every signal it nose...and you will become aroused beyond belief. Any arousal you've had prior pales in comparison. So go ahead, if you don't want a bond, ignore it. Try. It won't work. The more you ignore it, the more control you'll lose. Did I forget to mention? In this world, sexual drives are a little more animalistic than usual. They would have to be when the mainstay of the races is a sexual-based bond. Those who try to ward off the desire to become one with their other half can achieve mild success - until they absolutely lose themselves. It's not uncommon to see bonds going at it in the streets, unabashed and unashamed, for trying to hold off the inevitable. Sex between bonds in public, generally, is not looked down upon.

You've given in. Of course you did. But what now? The first time you have sex with your bond, it will be beyond compare. You will share memories with each other, as this is the opening of your psychic connection with them. Yes, psychic connection. How would you expect to be truly bonded otherwise? How strong this link is depends on how often you have sex. Even at baseline, though, you'll know if your bond is hurt or in trouble. Fair warning: this will pull at that animal brain, and you will go into a beserker mode to get them back with you. Similarly, you will behave in a territorial manner if you feel the bond is threatened; jealousy often results in shameless public sex, in hopes to re-establish the strength of your connection and make your bond realize that YOU'RE the other part of them, no one else. In addition, bonds don't handle separation well and each partner will be antsy and on edge. It can be done, and most pairs do because of work, duties, and life in general, but returns are usually accompanied by sometimes days-long sex sessions.

Aside from those quirks, the bonding process can be quite useful. A bond can calm you down, and sex with your bond can serve as the ultimate relaxer. Your bond is the one who can heal you, and sex boosts your strength and power. Yes, those of you looking to achieve your ultimate goal...or ultimate form. Being a bond makes you stronger. Don't resist, no matter how surly you are.

The bond is no respecter of person. Outside of sexuality such as straight or gay, types or species don't matter. You could be bonded with someone as different from you as night and day. However, no matter what the case, you'll begin to care for them in some fashion. You'll feel the need to be with each other as much as possible, both sexually and otherwise. They'll become the most important person in the world to you. Of course, this is assuming your bond is someone you can feasibly be with. Perhaps there is some truth to that reincarnation business, as sometimes, those souls are reborn into people who are never meant to be bonds - warring tribes, at-odds species, and even relatives or people with a great amount of age between them.

The bond is permanent. This is the person you were meant to be with, after all, until you die (and soul bonds usually die within years of each other). Theoretically, though, it can be broken. Mostly, this is done when one side betrays the other side somehow. As the bond is initiated through sex, it's broken in the same way. What happens next is rarely pretty. Police reports usually find the bodies of the dead bonded, cause of death specifically unknown.

Head spinning yet? It shouldn't be! This is the world you live in.

rules
- Comment with your character, preferences, what you're interested in, and what you're not interested in.
- Crosscanon tagging is expected and encouraged. Mention if you want to make some kind of canon-insertion AU with one of the characters or just have a nebulous AU.


prompts

Meeting - You see your bond in that way for the first time, and it's done. You're done. You have to have them to be complete.

Trying to Fight It - No, you're the type who rebels against this whole "soul bond" system. You're the master of your own design, and you won't give in despite the fact that you could just start masturbating right now.

Failure to Fight - The whole fighting thing didn't work out, and now you're going at each other like you'll die of thirst.

First Time - The legendary first time with soaring sensations, amazing orgasms, and the sharing of memories.

Not the Sharing Type - You're a private person and don't want your brain in someone else's. How can you reconcile this? Maybe doing the act can change your mind. Or maybe you just want relief so badly, you don't care.

Feedback - You feel all of your partners pleasure as well as their pain. If you can't come up with something kinky, I can't help you.

Dirty Thoughts - You know what's naughty? Sending mental images of what you'd like to do to your bond through your connection. It's like mental sexting - or a fun way to torture them.

Learning About Each Other - You're learning what both of you like and don't like and sharing as you go.

Jealousy - Someone tried to approach your bond and it made you a bit miffed. Now it's time for some affirmation of the connection and to make sure that you're still on their mind.

Rough Bond - Your bond is more hate than love sometimes, but it's a thin line. Besides, you still care more about them than anyone else, and god forbid someone hurt them. Besides, rough sex is fun.

Separation - You'll be apart for a while. You need one last hurrah

Reunion - You're back together. Now to make up for lost time. Not just because you want to, either.

Public - Remember how I said sex in public is accepted for bonds. Why not take advantage?

Chasing That High - You keep having sex with people, trying to find you bond.

Chasing That Low - In contrast to the above, you're trying to keep away from a bond by desensitizing yourself to sex.

Bond Party - Some young people throw "mixers" where, hopefully, you may meet your bond. Experimentation is bound to happen...even experimentation with multiple people at the same time, trying to find that one.

Can Never Be - Your bond is with someone you shouldn't have one with. They're your sworn enemy, your teacher, or your sibling. Your body and soul says yes, but your mind says no.

Strengthen - You need energy to defeat the big bad or rule the world. Go to your bond and recharge.

Comfort - A bond is often the only one who can calm their other half down, and that sometimes happens through a grounding via sex, bringing the upset party back to what really matters.

Healing - Healing wounds and healing the connection all comes down to body pressed against body. Just be careful of blood.

Long Time Bond - You've been together for some time now and you know each other like the back of your hands. You can make them come in ten seconds flat if need be, but it's more fun to drag things out, isn't it?

Ritual - You want to make your bond official in the eyes of the government. Unsurprisingly, the marriage ceremony is ritualistic sex.

Impregnation - There's no fertilization between the eggs and sperm of non-bonds, so one surefire way to make sure everything's on the up and up is to get pregnant.
Mind Games - Being psychically connected is all good until they fuck with your head.

Dependency - It's not always easy, being for, all intents and purposes, addicted to a person. You need them like you need breathing, and you'll take what you can even if you're ashamed.

Already with Someone - You love someone, but they're not your bond. Can they keep you when you meet your real bond?

I'm Not Yours, You're Not Mine - You know you're not bonds. Still you want them to stay with you and you'll do anything and try to be better.

False Bond - You thought you were bonded, you really did, until you met them

Faking It - There are benefits to faking a bond, including for safety, financial gain, and to secure alliances. Of course, you can't fake it in the bedroom.

Manipulating - You'll get what you want, even if you have to lie and pretend you're bonded to them...how you can fake that, no one knows, but it's worth a shot.

It's Not Me, It's You - Sometimes, mistakes are made. They're your bond, but you're not theirs.

Break the Bond - Because you have a death wish or a snuff kink.

My Ex-Lover is Dead - Your soul bond is gone and you're trying to fill the gap.

OR MAKE UP YOUR OWN


Now made with 10x more awful because Brock Rumlow is involved in it. I regret nothing and neither should any of you.

Comments

[imadebreakfast]

She didn't stagger, she barely even stumbled, but she did definitely backpedal a half step, and one could almost, almost hear the cartoon sound of squealing tires as she did so. Just enough to square her own position a little, despite the fact that her pulse had kicked up and the only reason that her breathing hadn't started to go short was because she wouldn't let it.

Remembering to breathe, learning how it had to work while in motion in the atmosphere alone was one of the first things they'd had to do with the wing packs and it was something she'd never un-learned. So even though her pulse was thudding away strongly enough that she could feel it in her chest, her joints, even under her tongue, her breathing remained stable.

As did her voice, when she replied: "It's worked so far, hasn't it?" Except for the part where it hadn't, not completely, not anywhere close to as well as she would have liked. There had been more than one day where she'd crashed out for at least twelve hours just to recharge her batteries, and even then it hadn't been a real fix, she'd been getting distracted more and more easily the past week or so, enough so that she'd almost cold-clocked Steve for sneaking up on her. Except for the fact that he hadn't, he'd already been in the room and her mind had just been elsewhere.

[infligere]

It was everything that he had left not to cross the distance that separated them to be closer to where she stood. Somehow, the twisting need kept him rooted on the spot to enjoy the discomfort that it caused him, and especially because he knew that she would be dealing with her own discomfort at the same time. It was a nice thought really... she suffered when he did. There were very few people who could appreciate and still hate that reality, but he did and relished the hate he felt for the situation.

He refused to let any of that show as he stared at her like they were in some kind of stand-off. Perhaps they were. He was curious which of them would break first, and he liked to think himself a better man than that or just more used to enduring pain the longer that they were separated. The pounding in his head to get closer and not further was very much present after all.

"You know we can't do this forever or even more than a few more months," he replied with a shrug of his shoulders, shifting the bag of groceries to his other arm. "Eventually, we're going to have to get a little close to avoid agony. Of course... acknowledging a bond makes it worse, doesn't it? You haven't told Rogers yet, have you?"

[imadebreakfast]

She knew that she was going to crack first, just the same as she knew she should already have walked away. But she wasn't to the breaking point yet, and had no plans on reaching it today, even though she actually had to bite her tongue to keep from answering that first question.

Besides, it wasn't like they didn't already both know the answer to it.

She did, however, answer the second, shaking her head just once, "No. I haven't. He doesn't need the stress." Because she knew that while he wouldn't drop everything, he would at least drop some of it to find a way to help her, or at least look for some way to make it easier. Or maybe to find someone to try and knock Rumlow off before either of them gave in.

She could still leave. She should leave, before either of them got any ideas. But she couldn't quite make herself do it. Just like she couldn't quite make herself hate him, hell, she didn't even know him, and while she definitely hated who he'd stood for, and more than hated the fucked-up situation, hating him personally was another matter.

"How's your concentration been this week? I'm going to guess pretty crappy, yeah?" Lord only knew hers had been, and she couldn't imagine his had been that much better.

[infligere]

He shifted his weight on his feet, aware that it was dangerous for him to be out in public like this. There was no telling when a camera was going to flash and accidentally catch him, displaying his face for recognition programs that the government and HYDRA would be running. He did't move away nor did he try to hide himself into the shadow of a building, not yet anyway. The risk seemed much less when he was facing her down like this, and so he was able to pass it off.

"I'm not sure how you finding a bond would be stressful on him. It's between us, isn't it?" Oh he knew that it would cause stress and limit a bit of what the pair could do without him when it came to the Soldier. It was just funny to think that Rogers couldn't lay a hand on him too hard without it coming back to hurt her in response. He couldn't be killed or she'd be condemned to meet a similar fate it not right away but soon after.

He vowed that he wasn't going to leave until she made the first step to abandon this encounter. He had started it after all, so he was going to see it through to the end. There was nothing else entertaining to do for the day after all, and he found her very interesting. He chuckled at her question though.

"It's been the shits. I can't seem to stay on any one thing for long," he replied casually as if it didn't really bother him. "I get distracted easily too." Not now; if anything, he was hyperfocused on her.

[imadebreakfast]

She just arched a brow at that first question, because she knew where they each stood, respectively, in Steve's circle of trust, herself well on the inside, and Rumlow somewhere miles off the far edge. And with her being sidekick and outside viewpoint both on the whole 'track down Barnes' project, any bond would prove dicey. Moreso one between them. Which honestly she wasn't entirely thrilled at the prospect of, either.

Honestly it probably wasn't all that great an idea for her to be alone out in public either, which was part of why she had Steve on speed dial, and hadn't been an idiot about where she was going. Until now. She honestly hadn't realized why she was using the alley as a cut-through until she was already there, and now of course she knew why, goddamn biological GPS.

"Until now, right?" She huffed, something that might have been a laugh if she'd actually been amused by the situation, because she could focus on him just fine, she wanted to, except at the same time she really really didn't, "Guess that's just more proof of what we already know."

Rough Bond + Separation & Reunion I guess, also TL;DR omg

[legaxtum]

Really Sharon didn’t have anything against the soul bond deal, it was a lovely idea and it could be romantic, she supposed depending on who you ended bonded with. She had after all heard the stories from people that had been bonded and been so happy, her parents, her aunt Peggy and several others that painted the whole deal as a wonderful and the most beautiful thing that could happen to you but only if you were leading the right life.

On practical level, Sharon realized that the whole soul bond deal was more of a liability than something that could be useful and harmonious with the line of work and the type of life she led. Whether it was civilian or another agent, it was more of a danger and an inconvenience since it affected the perfect mental balance required for S.H.I.E.L.D work, the work and goal that had been her whole life since she heard her aunt Peggy tales, and maybe that was the main reason for a long while she had been quite happy that she had dodged the bullet when it came to it, unlike some other fellow agents.

But of course she couldn’t keep dodging the bullet forever and she felt the tell tale signs of it when she met Brock Rumlow and God, how had she cursed everything that apparently her soul bond was such a cocky and obnoxious bastard that she had pretty much hated from the get go and it had appeared to be mutual. And of course, hate had nothing to do with it when the other instincts of the bond were still there and couldn’t be ignored, but it didn’t stopped things from being bitter, hateful, rough and scornful between them.

It had been that stupid and damn bond what had made her refuse Steve when he had asked her, she didn’t wanted to drag him to the messy deal she was with Rumlow and she still remembered the last time someone had tried to approach her and the man hadn’t liked it, it had been a bit vicious and while she knew Rumlow wouldn’t be able to take on Steve, well she preferred to avoid anything since she didn’t wanted scandal to follow her and it WASN’T because there was a barely there twinge of protectiveness for the bastard.

So when it turned out her soul bond was a Hydra agent, she hadn’t exactly been that surprised and she just KNEW it, the moment Steve message had come she knew it and she hadn’t regretted pointing that gun or starting that fight with him, he was her soul bond yes, but it didn’t changed she hated him more than anything and that he had aided to taint her long life dream. After that whole ordeal was over, she had briefly seen him on the hospital and whatever pang she felt at seeing him like that was quickly smothered by her disdain and scorn against him.

And that had been around six months ago, he had of course broken out or had been aided by Hydra to leave the hospital, and he had fallen off the radar. Thankfully he hadn’t tried to search for her and she was very good at ignoring the effects the separation were having on her, she had carried on and right now, she was feeling a small pang of victory over the fact she had aided Captain Rogers to finally track down and catch the Winter Soldier, which was a victory over Hydra and the bastard of her soul bond.

Sharon checked her reflection on her bathroom mirror and winced a bit at her split lip, she should count herself lucky that she had only ended with a few bruises and scrapes, considering who they had been against. “It really could have been worse.”

[infligere]

Oh he knew very well where he stood in comparison to her when it came to Rogers' good graces. However, he ironically knew where he stood in the good graces of the man that Steve was bumbling around looking for as well, and that could just make a wonderful reunion if they learned how to get along at all. Of course, no one else knew that, and there was no point in letting that slip in the streets. He prided himself on keeping some important information to himself.

"Yeah, now everything is clear and clean by my eyes," he agreed with a smirk because it had been similar to how it had been before the helicarrier broke up the moment that they had been trying to have on the forty-first floor together. "I haven't been this clear since jumping out of a building with you. You sure know how to get the adrenaline pumping."

He glanced to either side of the area they were standing in before he gestured a little with his head. "You want to come over and have a sit down. I think we have some unfinished business and since you haven't walked away yet, I figure that you're not going to."

[infligere]

He hated more things than he liked, though he knew how to fake liking more than he faked hating. It was just unfortunate that the soul bond thing existed in the first place and he got wrapped up into it when he had no time for that kind of bullshit. It was just good that their hate for each other was mutual and there would never be any kind of love to get in the way of their missions or their duties. He preferred to never have an attachment that he couldn't break when it suited him, but unfortunately the bond was permanent. That was very unfortunate.

Still, they managed around it, the few times that they reduced themselves to the kind of activity that was required for upkeep and contentment had been few and far between. The times it had happened, it had been rough and engaging, the kind of sex that left him worn out but entirely satisfied even after he rolled out of bed, set her down from being nailed against a locker or hiking his pants up after a trip to the couch. It was all good stuff, but he was just as content to leave.

Then actual life got in the way, he'd almost died and instead lost any chance of getting too far in the United States anymore. He spent months in recovery, carefully monitored from a few medical professional whose over all point of view of life aligned with his own and they hadn't been exposed in the big information dump. They had been the reason he had gotten out, and he slipped away without much thought for his bond. He knew she was out there.

Eventually, the separation was uncomfortable enough to go looking for her. The Soldier was out of HYDRA's hands for the moment, but he didn't care about that. With help of current information, he found her apartment and slipped inside, the first time he had probably been there. It smelled like her, and that soothed some of his rough nerves as he waited for her to return and stalked quietly to the bathroom.

"It can always get worse, sweetheart," he said as he stepped into the doorway. "How about a kiss for old time's sake?"

[eleutheria]

A small sigh escaped her lips then, knowing that whatever moment that had been happening had been lost again and it was going to take awhile to recapture it again. “Yes, of course.” She said softly and turned her attention on cleaning the kitchen, not feeling hungry anymore and feeling maybe just a bit annoyed at Tony, she had no idea what the heck was wrong with that man and why he kept doing this.

Knowing the usual deal when this happened, she didn’t went to search for him and just decided to wait for him to come back and find her instead, if he ever decided to do that since she was now noticing she was usually the one that went to look for him in the end. With another sigh she settled on the common room, where everyone gathered when they all happened to be in the tower at the same time, and settled to watch a movie from that catching up list she had.

The one that ended finding her was Clint though, being lured by the Lord of the Rings movie and the fact that without Natasha around he didn’t had a lot to do. When the archer decided to use her lap as a pillow she allowed him to do so, since it meant nothing with her at least, it was probably just comfortable for him since his head always ended on Nat’s lap when they were all watching movies and it was just familiar for him, Stephanie understood it was an unspoken action of the fact he missed her but he was lucky, she was going to come back after all.

At some point she ended dozing off, not because she found the movie boring but she had just felt tired and she was just a bit confused when she woke up. She could still feel the weight on her lap and she sighed a bit “God, my back is killing me a bit.” This was the worst position to sleep ever.

[imadebreakfast]

"No I haven't." And that was an actual laugh, which surprised her as much as anything, "I should. I really should. But I haven't." She shrugged then, but she did step forward, moving carefully and keeping her arms free just in case she had to pop him one and make a break for it.

Not that she had any confidence that she'd actually be able to, but she was going to have to try at least, "What can I say? I like living dangerously." This was at least partly true, it would certainly explain why she'd signed up for para-rescue in the first place, why she'd volunteered for the EXO program, and also why she was riding shotgun on Steve's quest.

"But between you and me? I'm happy keeping that business unfinished for as long as possible." He was even less her type than Riley had been, but she knew biology didn't give a damn, something that was becoming increasingly more obvious.

[legaxtum]

She was pressing a cold damp hand towel on her busted lip, catching the slight trickle of blood and knowing this was something that was going to mend on its own, when she caught a flicker of movement from the corner of her eye and she inwardly cursed when she hear that awfully familiar voice. She finished tending to her lip, before slightly turning to look at him with a blank expression.

“You mean worse than having you in my apartment?” She decided not to dignify the last question with an answer, since she will be more than happy to give him a punch for old time’s sakes. “I really thought that you had died, but then some pests are quite hard to get rid of.”

And she might need to ask someone to keep her location better guarded or to move again, after the whole mess and with all the exposure she had left the apartment where she had been monitoring Steve and it only made place to get a new place, for a brand new start and one that hadn’t included him. It also annoyed her that he was on her place, before everything happened, they had never been in each other places and on the times they had engaged the other in a bed, it had been in hotels and the like, never their actual homes.

“Who took care of you, hmm?” Her eyes flickered over him; it must have been professionals obviously since he wouldn’t have survived otherwise. “You were looking worse than usual last I saw you, darling.”

[disassembling]

The Winter Soldier had changed out of his juice covered clothing and wandered down to one of the training rooms to work out all this horrible energy that had built up in him. He worked out until there was nothing left but trembling muscles, being out of breath and still uncertain what he was supposed to do to keep Stephanie even mildly interested in doing anything about their bond. She seemed so free... where he felt like he was walking a field of landmines and each one seemed to explode when he thought that for a moment he was getting close to something special again.

Was it that he had to be forceful with her, take all manner of physical obviousness to lure her back to him? That wasn't how he tended to work, and he wondered if that had been how he had acted in the past. He suspected that his past self had used more words and casual gestures rather than outright groping.

He sighed and had worked out too many hours to probably be good for him. He showered to wash off the sweat and vowed to go and talk to Stephanie about what was happening. He didn't understand completely, and he had been told that it was better to communicate about what was happening then sit and let it fester. He thought about what he might say when he managed to get her alone and he even brushed and pulled his hair back into a ponytail rather than hide behind the usual curtain of it.

He moved around to one of the communal areas and found her watching a movie, approaching from the back of the couch and about to put his hands on either side of where her head rested when he froze at the sight of a Barton's head resting in her lap. That same hot anger seemed to warm his blood, and even though he rationally knew that Barton was with the Widow, he trembled along his shoulders with how comfortable the pair looked.

He withdrew as she woke up, stepping away and moving off towards the doorway again.

[eleutheria]

The sound of steps was what alerted her that someone else was around and she tilted her head a bit. “Bucky.” She smiled a bit when she saw him, though she wasn’t sure just yet if he was leaving or what, she was still a bit addled with sleep. “Where have you been?” She hadn’t seen him in a while and that made her think just how late it was, was it time for lunch or something.

Slowly she looked down at Clint and shook her head with an amused smile before poking his cheek. “Barton, wake up.” There was only an annoyed groan in response. “Isn’t this around the time you call Natasha? Remember what happened the last time you didn’t?”

There was a muttered ‘Fine, fine’ while he sat up, stretched and quietly thanked her before moving to leave the room, with a slight nod to acknowledge Bucky before leaving the room and going to call the Widow, she had no idea how they managed to keep those calls without being traced or recorded, but it shouldn’t be surprising since they were indeed the best at what they did. Taking a deep breath she turned to look at Bucky, something was wrong; she could feel the slight piercing at the back of her mind at the moment.

“Are you alright?” It was probably not the best thing to ask, there were some things that were not and she wishes she could take it back. “Want to watch something with me?”

[cloneororiginal]

There was no point in running from the Soldier. He was known for taking down an army by himself. What chance did a clone have against him? None, that's what, but it was the first thing Sarah had learned. Whenever danger was there, you ran. You ran until you think you're safe, or until you had the upper hand. The next lesson was always come prepared. If she had stuck to her lie, or coldly, she might have avoided the confrontation. She ran down the hall, recalling where each corridor lead to. As long as she avoided the turns that lead to dead ends, she might have a chance.

Her chances went up in flames within a matter of seconds. He was there, blocking her exit. Fuck, she really hated life and HYDRA right now.

She glared at him, wishing his handler would call him back and leave her be. Sarah wanted to be anywhere else but here. If she learned to control her tongue she would not be in this mess. She couldn't lie, nor could she avoid the question itself. Would he beat the answer out of her? What lengths would he go to find out? And why did he care?

"No," Sarah was being foolishly stubborn, but that had always been her flaw.

"I don't have t'answer you."

[cloneororiginal]

Sarah's glare turned heated, throwing a hard right hook at the punching bag, throwing all of her weight into it. Brock's attitude wasn't the thing that pissed her off (though on most days it was). "I don't need to woo you either. You're already mine." Those words sparked a fire in her, wanting to break his bones and prove she didn't belonged to him. Her body was already HYDRA's property, her soul didn't belong to Brock. She wanted to own a piece of herself, she wanted control. If it meant denying what they both needed, then fine. She could at least do that.

"Get the fuck outta my sight," she snarled, hitting the bag again for emphasis.

"I'm so sick and fuckin' tired of your shite, Brock. You need t'take the edge off? Shag another bitch, not me. Not this time." Even if it meant she would put herself through some personal hell it didn't matter. As much as her body wanted to be closer, to be intimate, she would stop herself from giving in.

At least with him being away on his missions she wouldn't have to deal with him. If the chance came where HYDRA had to 'fight' against Shield and he was there, Sarah would not hold herself back. She would go after him, not caring of how badly she'd hurt herself in the process. But as much as she hated him, if anyone else came after them, she would kill them first.

[you_know_me]

No one had ever told him that he had to be 'good' as it were. She definitely never told him that and he knew it. Though that scowl gets a bit of a pout out of her, "I am not." She pulls on one of his shirts and walks into the kitchen, pressing up against his back.

"You should've given me something to do while you were gone. Because I was bored and one thing led to another... You know how I get when I'm bored and don't want to sketch."

[aktiv]

Those eyes narrow a bit more, "You don't have any memories of 'us'." Sorry, Rumlow, but she wasn't going to believe you on that one. After all, it's not like you're giving anything. Nothing that would jog that memory of hers even though it'd be taken the moment she was wiped. Something that was going to happen in the next ten minutes, they both knew that.

"You don't know anything." Perhaps she was annoyed and testy that he hadn't taken a more aggressive stance with her, but maybe it was something else. Either way... if he thought she was going to break down and come to him, he was crazy. Then again... it could happen after the mind wipe too.

[disassembling]

He eyed her when she showed up in one of his shirts, and it was totally pleasing to see it there. Just big enough to let his imagination slip off where it shouldn't. She was clearly doing it on purpose as well, and he frowned at her. "You are and you know it."

He began to unpack their groceries, hurried though the trip was in the end. He snorted at her accusation like this was all his fault. It wasn't. He'd take the blame anyway because it was fun. "Yeah well... what a horrible person I am to believe you can entertain yourself in ways that don't torment me at a supermarket."

[disassembling]

He knew what it was now. Sometimes when the anger grew, there was a clarity that couldn't come to him any other way, and he had been waiting for such a moment to occur in the first place. There it was, that moment when he realized why he was unable to have what so many - all the men apparently - could have with Stephanie that he was denied despite he being her bond. He'd figured it out, but that didn't make it any easier when all he had right now was her and a misguided purpose to try to heal and get better.

He stopped when Barton moved, turning his face aside as if the wall next to him was the most interesting thing in the world. He didn't acknowledge the other man, but that was more common than when he did, so he doubted that it caused any kind of stir, not when the carnie had a phone call to make anyway.

He should leave, let her get on with whatever she had been doing with Barton, though it looked only to be sleeping. He was so close to just walking away, and he didn't know what kept him there when he knew at any moment, Tony was going to pop in and take the seat or whatever it was that the man did alone with Stephanie that he wasn't privy to. No matter, he knew why.

"I'm coping," he murmured. That was what Banner told him to say when he couldn't answer the question otherwise. He didn't care much for the difference. "I'm not familiar with movies or television. It would be pointless for me to watch anything."

[disassembling]

It was just the two of them in the room together. When he was on premise, a handler was not required to be stationed with him at all times like on missions. He was more docile on HYDRA bases, able to be commanded by technicians and handlers alike but generally not other soldiers unless it suited him to do so. Normally, aside from debriefings, he had little contact with other soldiers or front line individuals in a similar position to himself. While this wasn't wholly new, it was still different enough to have his full attention.

He didn't pull a knife on her, though he could have given that he was fully armed for combat. He didn't have to pull a weapon on her really; he was stronger and faster than she was and that gave him and advantage that didn't require the use of a weapon.

"Answer. Are you mine?"

[infligere]

No, she hadn't and just like he had planned, she was the one to move to him and not the other way around. He watched her come closer, aware that this could end in a fight of some kind right in the streets, though he was hoping to avoid the attention that it would draw. He liked watching her move though, a soldier's walk, confident in one's own skin and no wasted energy to unnecessary motions. "Yeah, you should... but you haven't."

He shifted when she was close enough, reaching into his bag of groceries slowly and with a disarming smirk if there ever was one. He made certain that his movements were clean but unhurried so she didn't think he was going to pull a knife or a gun on her. Not yet anyway. That might come later. For now, he instead pulled out an apple and offered it to her. A gift, a show of being able to provide. It overrode any disgust he might have felt for doing so.

"You know that's only going to happen so long, babe," he replied. "Sooner or later, we're going to mess up. However, to be fair, if we plan this right, no one has to know about it and we don't have to see each other that often. It's all about the contingency plan though."

[infligere]

"Oh it can always be worse, and you know it," he replied as he came to lean on the frame of the bathroom, not actually moving inside to trap her yet. He was confident in the situation and plus, he actually wanted the ability to slip away if she somehow had some stupid panic button somewhere in there. He was not getting caught for taking a risk to come and see her. However, already, the strain was lessening. Basking in his presence was enough, the bond satisfied that he had done what was required for comfort for the time being.

"If I had died, you'd have been the first to know. The bond breaks and then you get the pleasure of wallowing in depression and then following me into death," he said conversationally. Because he had a bond, it meant that he had looked into the ins and outs of it, especially given that they stood on opposite sides and he couldn't have something like her getting killed off mess up his real life choices. It wasn't that ironic to him that it had almost been him to take them to death together.

"I have friends in high places, I guess. A real smooth guardian angel," he said with a shrug. The scarring was minimal, skin grafts clean. The real miracle of science and becoming a HYDRA experiment of his own for a month or two. Whatever. "You're looking the same. Got a boyfriend yet?"

[infligere]

There was nothing quite like the pleasure of seeing her get all riled up and snarky with him. It happened more and more when he visited, and there were times that he went out of his way to see if he could bug her into doing the snarling like what she was currently doing. It was times like these that he didn't mind the bond because he felt her anger and dislike on a whole new level internally and it was probably one of his bigger turn ons.

He still held the bag, letting her beat the hell out of it and made no move to leave. He instead chuckled from where he was hidden behind it, letting her hear his mirth at her antics and her cussing at him. Damn if she didn't give him an erection right then and there, but he had control of himself even in his presence and their time could turn to violence at any moment. Any unfortunate bodily response could hinder him and he couldn't have that.

"Who said anything about screwing anyone? I just came to see you, bask in your lovely personality before I had to go," he said before tilted his head around the bag to eye her, offering a wink. "Besides, you're taken off any edge I might have had about being parted. You're so good at getting through to me, sweetheart."

[infligere]

She was so interesting when she got all riled up, and he really wondered after that cold efficient weapon that she was supposed to be when she was snarling like this. "Oh but I do. I play over them before bed every night," he replied with feigned great affection. He did save all the memories that he had of her, only because he was forced to with their bond. When she suffered, he suffered, though he said nothing about it.

"I know a few things," he said, lifting a hand so he could tip them off on his fingers. "I know we're bonded. I know you're about to be wiped. I know it hurts us both to be parted for too long. I know we practically throw ourselves at each other when you come out of cryo because it's been so long." He shrugged his shoulders. "Good like I like pain, isn't it?"

[cloneororiginal]

Sarah's glare turned heated. She didn't have to answer him. He wasn't her commanding officer. He wasn't anything to her, but in denying that, it brought another bout of pain for her. She didn't let it register on face, only holding onto her anger to keep up her facade. Why did he want to know?

"I don't have to answer," she growled, preparing to back away from him and sprint in the other direction.

He was more than capable of taking her down, but he continued to ask, trying to drag it out of her. It was more frustrating than anything else.